All the items in my closet stressing me out
A wardrobe cleanse calls for some reflecting
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Bright blue, V-Neck tank top, Forever 21, probably bought in high school. Way too cropped. I wore it for the Fourth of July and felt awkward the whole time. Can I not let go of things, or am I just a sustainable queen? Donate.
Orange spaghetti strap baby doll top. Clearance from Express. I whiplashed into bright colors after forming a capsule wardrobe of only white, black, and tan. I pictured wearing this on some European vacation. Who was I kidding? I look like a puffy tangerine. Donate.
Red, ruched, wide-necked top. Abercrombie. Classy for a night out with a black skirt and black boots, but it’s still not the right time for crimson red. Also from my post-capsule wardrobe escapades. I bought all these colors, but the reality is, I hate wearing color. An occasion will come up though. Keep.
White V-Neck baby doll tank top. Brandy Melville. Another version in pink and white. Bought in a delusional moment of optimism. (I was going through a baby doll phase, okay?) Perfect for a picnic in Central Park. I don’t live anywhere near Central Park. Also, why did I need two? I’ll keep them for next summer, I guess.
White button-down shirt with green stripes that somehow turned yellow. Old Navy. Used to be good for work-from-home, but in public? Ergh. How did it turn yellow if it never left my house? Also, incredibly wrinkled. Should I just throw it away? Probably.
Tight lime green T-Shirt, Forever 21. I was trying to do something with this, but every time I put it on, I feel like you can see the sweat stains. Also from high school. I need to let go of things that aren’t meant for me.
Strapless denim crop top, Urban Outfitters. The zipper pinches, and I haven’t worn it since I tried it on. Was going for Y2K, Britney Spears, club scene. Not the most versatile item in my closet…Still, something about it calls to me. Keep.
Ribbed neon blue corset. Express. Thought the color was bold and sexy, and I’m obsessed with an A-line neck. Also bought this to go out, and now it’s reminding me that I don’t have fun anymore. I still love it though. Keep.
High-necked neon pink tank top with chain-link shoulder straps. Department store. Probably bought after the Barbie craze. A little too sophisticated for its color. Campy, but nowhere to wear it. Donate?
Black-and-cream strapless babydoll top. Department store. Love this, adore this. I don’t feel confident enough to wear it anywhere. When I think about my ideal life, I’m wearing this on a stroll in the park, the weather is in the 70s, and my hair is slicked back. I am happy. Keep.
Wrinkled silk yellow-cream blouse, Abercrombie. Bought from a second-hand shop. Great as an overshirt but hard to maintain. It’s going to start pilling if I’m not careful. I’ll still wear it–it’s just stressing me out. Keep. And maybe run through the dryer.
Pastel yellow ruched button-up shirt. Tag still on. One of those clothing delivery services my mom does. I love yellow, but this shade makes me look a little too pink. Thought it was a soft, quaint, girl-next-door vibe when I first tried it on, but now it looks more like I stole it from grandma’s closet. I should’ve sent it back with the other clothes, but it’s too late now. Maybe I can make it work at some point. Keep.
Cropped green overshirt with a front-tie. Abercrombie. Four years old, at least. Supposedly brings out my eyes. Wore it in college once to an evening outing with friends. I was really trying something with the green here, and it’s just not working. Donate.
Three blazers, two Windsor tan and one black. Unworn for two years. Reminding me that I don’t have an office to commute into, but business casual is evergreen. Keep.
Jean jacket from college that is too tight around the shoulders and frankly, out of style. Bought at a discount from a surf shop where I worked for a summer. I should’ve donated this years ago. Seriously. Why is this still here? Donate.
Magenta, high-necked tank top with diagonal buttons running up the right side. Abercrombie. Tagged $60 but I think I got it on sale. I have it in the same style in three other colors, and this is the one I’m least likely to wear. I’m a creature of habit. Sell or donate. (Update: my mom took this one).
Half-sleeve cotton, button-up white blouse. Zara. Also has turned slightly yellow, but that was from wearing it into a pollen-invested lake as a bathing suit cover up, so that’s entirely on me. I’ll keep it. For the beach.
Strapless, silk, rust-colored dress. Tag still on–TJ Maxx, $29.99. Beautiful and sophisticated for a good price. It even has a leg slit. Perfect for a wedding. Do I have any wedding invites? No. But I’ll keep it anyway. Sigh.
Zip-up denim romper. Forever 21. Too short and too tight. Bummer. Bought last summer. It would’ve been cute in theory but I didn’t want to deal with chafing. As with most things in life that don’t deserve it, I’ll give it one more chance. Keep.
Feel free to judge my life choices in the comments.
Read my last story: The Taylor Swift haters are back, but in disguise
My weekly roundup:
😇 What I’m Doing: I’ve been MIA for a bit, soz!1 You get this “personal essay” piece that was living in my Notes app for that reason
🎶 What I’m Listening To: Lola Young
🎞️ What I’m Watching: House of Guinness and Secret Lives of Mormon Wives! Obsessed with both of these
📱 What I’m Scrolling: Will Gen Z end up with more memories of other peoples’ lives than our own?
⚠️ What’s On My Radar: Gen Z vs. employment continues. Read my outdated take here
Read the full Gen Z Dictionary here.
Soz: short for “sorry”